The Intelligent Food Conundrum

For the Second World Seabird Conference

Check out their website here! It's a place were i'd like to be. See some Albatrosses

Not Coming Out!

Sometines an albatross chick can spend some extra time inside the egg. Parents don't usually help with the hatching.

A Complicated Mating Dance

It is known that Albatrosses have quite a complicated courtship dance ritual.

The Moment of Consciousness

The Booby

A Booby is a funny awkward little seabird, right? Well... Wrong. Don't be fooled by the name - they should be called stormbirds ore something like that.

Plastic Pollution Limerick

My friend and albatross lover Sybren Renema send me this powerful limerick about the problems of plastic ocean pollution:

There once was an albie from Leith,
Who thought he had plenty to eat,
But his health eroded
'till his stomach exploded
For plastic digests not like meat.

Perfect Landing

Yes, Albatrosses do spend years at sea without ever touching firm ground.

Preening

Preening - there is nothing quite like it.

Landsick

I hear Albatrosses can spend up to ten years without setting a webbed foot on land. Can you imagine living so long without touching anything stable and firm? And when they come to land they do it for one reason only. Yes, you guessed it.

1000 Albatrosses

So today we got 1000 likes on our Facebook Albatrosses page, this might seem unimportant, but just imagine 1000 people smiling at an albatrosses cartoon. That's a thousand smiles. I like that. So I made this drawing for you and if, by chance you'd like to have a 1000 Albatrosses iPhone cover or something like that. Check out our store here.

And keep on smiling

Shark Shaped Motivation

Every year at fledging time, tiger sharks gather to feast on the less motivated Albatrosses. It's fly or die time.

The Famous Wing-Lock

Albatrosses are aided in soaring by a wing-lock mechanism, a sheet of tendons that lock the wing when fully extended, allowing the wings to be kept outstretched without any energy expenditure. Neat, huh?

A Limerick by the poet Albatross

There once was a bloody big Albatross
who struggled to get the idea across
that the great big blue sea
is a nice place to be,
But with garbage it's thick just like applesauce.

Yes, that's right, I've rhymed Albatross with Applesauce. That's how my mind works and I'm not ashamed to say so.

Vacation in Heligoland

I hear that a Black-browed Albatross has been sighted in Heligoland on the 19th of April 2015. Just like last year in May. Remember? I wonder if it's the same bird...

You can read more about this here in this excelent article by Felix Timmermann

National Geographic Magazine

You can find the said National Geographic article by Carl Safina HERE. It's well worth the read!

Not So Funny

Self-Conscious Waddlers

It is a well known fact that Albatrosses are master flyers. Less well known is the fact that they are close to useless on land.

That might explain why they spend so little time there.

A Haruspex and a Biologist

From looking at the guts of dead albatrosses a biologist can often say how the bird died. And it's usually due to the ingestion of plastic materials. I wonder what a Haruspex would say of our future by looking at those same guts... What do you think? Let me know in the comments. Do you know what a Haruspex is? Well, look it up and learn something new.

Oil Slick

Thank you Paul DeMerchant for the inspiration! This one is for you!

Release The Fledglings

Young albatrosses will return to land after reaching sexual maturity. But that may take some time.

A Haiku from the Poet Albatross

This cartoon is based on a Haiku by Julia Fiedorczuk and Gerardo Beltrán for the Ecopoetics project, because some things have to be said with a poem.

Plastic Food

Did you know that Albatrosses and other wildlife die from plastic in their food chain? Plastic Food kills and it's not as if those animals had the healthy food option we arguably do.

You can learn more about this on the Plastic Pollution Coalition website.

Moon Pun

It's funny if you think about it too long...

The Shooting Star

Children have questions. Sometimes you might feel tempted to make up the answer. Do it. Make this world more magical.

The Fight-or-Flight Response

The First Landing

There has got to be a first landing.

The Procrastination Paradox

Oh yes, you know what I'm talking about, don't you?

It's All About Notoriety

"Notoriety isn't better than fame, but it sure as hell beats obscurity" A Quote by Terry Pratchett and/or Neil Gaimen from the book Good Omens

I think Napoleon said something similar.

Arachnophobia

The Birds and Bees

Did you know about the waggle dance? Bees are fascinating animals.

The one about the Corkscrew-shaped Penis

Long Nights

The Heligoland Albatross

So, this is a real news item I am exited about: A Black-browed Albatross was sighted near Skagen in Denmark on the 25/26th of May, and then in Heligoland in the last week of May and into June. There is more about this on the ACAP Website here..

Maybe one day I'll see my first Albatross here in Portugal...

Landing is Tough

An Ill Literate

It's not a very good joke, but I made it up myself. So that's nice.

Easter Prank

Quality Evening Entertainment

What can I say - watch less TV...

The Albatross Adventurer

Well, If you know nothing of Internet Memes, you might wonder about this one. But If you got the joke, leave a comment and we are friends.

Calamari al profumo di limone

Ocean Acidification is becoming more and more of a problem. This week I heard of a study that concluded that higher levels of dissolved carbon in the water makes it so that fishes get caught more easily by predators. Sadly there is no lemon flavor involved.

Will you be my Valentine?

Will you be my Valentine?

Asleep at the wing

The heligoland albatross is back for the 4th year running... or rather flying. And speaking of flying. Did you know that albatrosses can sleep in the air? Cool, hu?

Albatross T'ai chi

Albatross T'ai chi ch'uan - Why not? It's a stressful life.

Striving to be a Better Albatross

The most splendid achievement of all is the constant striving to surpass yourself and to be worthy of your own approval.

quote by Denis Waitley

The World Turned Upside Down

Plastic Inflation

There is such a thing as plastic inflation.

Plastic Currency

This one is about Plastic Pollution and a bit about greed.

Soar in the Wind!

It can get quite windy down where the wild Albatrosses are.

Save the Albatross

They are not cuddly cute, nor can they be ever held in a zoo because a thousand mile flight is a stroll around the block for them. So most people don't even know what an albatross is, and those who do, have never seen an albatross, nor will they, as albatrosses mostly live in remote parts of the southern hemisphere, far away from civilization. If, by chance, you do come across an albatross, you cannot pat it, and the only dignified way to capture it, is in a poem, or a photo if you've got a big telescopic lens because you may not come too close. Albatrosses are not at all like Pandas. If they were more like pandas, maybe fundraising would be easier.

Unfortunately albatrosses are no strangers to the IUCN Red List. Too many birds drown caught on long-line fishing hooks as they try to eat the bait. Uncounted others die due to plastic pollution. These magnificent seabirds need our help.

How? Well, here's the pitch: If you buy a signed print of a witty Albatrosses cartoon for 40 euros (Here in our online store), we will ship it to you free of charge in a plastic-free package and give 20 euros to the Foundation for Antarctic Research to help them learn more about the Albatross. The funds will be used to buy bird tags for the albatrosses on Diego Ramirez to study the overlap of the bird's feeding areas with the fishing areas.

Albatrosses is a twice-monthly comic strip I draw about a somewhat unusual colony of albatrosses lost somewhere in the South Pacific. Its aim is to reveal the plight of the albatross to everyone using wit and humor, promoting a better understanding of the need to save the albatross along with the panda.

Help me Save the Albatross,
Marc Parchow
photo by Herma van Gerner

• Buy the Albatrosses Prints HERE to help save the albatross.
• If you have any question you can contact me at marc (at)qualalbatroz (dot)pt
• And If you want to know more about the Foundation and the Diego Ramirez project, please mail Sandra Birnhak at birnhardt (at)aol (dot)com